"Through the Fire" - A Caregiver's Experience
August 11, 2022 at 11:48 a.m.
"Through the Fire" - A Caregiver's Experience
By Chris Cameron
Eight years ago, three days after she retired, Donna and her husband Dale, who had taught and coached at Lemon Bay HS for 24 years, took off for a retirement trip to celebrate with friends. On the way there, Dale suffered what was found to be two massive strokes, and Donna became a 24/7 caregiver in the blink of an eye. For four years, she chronicled her journey as a dedicated caregiver for her husband. The foundation of her strength was her faith in God and the support of family and friends during the time she was consumed both with Dale’s care and with a learning process focused on brain health and rehab resources that would best assist Dale.
“Through the Fire – A Caregiver’s Journal” was published in May 2022, and is the first of a planned series of books dedicated to those who are full time caregivers and their families. Having been an English teacher gave Donna the skills to articulate and document this journey, and the book tells her story with the hope that it will be of value to others living out this same role. The book provides an education in dealing with a loved one whose life has been altered by a stroke, learning that person’s new strengths and weaknesses, as well as troubleshooting and addressing new life challenges for the entire family. She also reflectively inserts tips and insights of what she wished she would have known during very trying times.
Having lived as a full-time caregiver for four years before Dale passed, Donna says she wrote the book she wishes someone had handed her when Dale had his first stroke. She is still in touch with fellow caregivers she met along the way as well as many others and recommends a website, www.CaringBridge.org, which allows the author to set up a page with privacy settings where you can share your thoughts, record patient progress, receive support and messages. It can serve as a source for extended family and friends to read updates when the caregiver (or patient) is too occupied to reach out.
I asked Donna what she would like non-caregivers and even family to consider when supporting a caregiver. She answered to enable the caregiver to take care of her/himself. Suggestions include preparing a meal, entertaining, or sitting with the patient to allow the caregiver to take a nap or run errands, or simply bringing fresh-cut flowers. Some can offer to go long on rides to medical appointments to provide company for the patient in the back seat, simply listen when someone needs to vent, just give a hug, or state a specific way you can be available to help.
“Through the Fire – A Caregiver’s Journal” is available through Amazon for $14.95 and eBook for $4.95. The audiobook version was engineered by local area resident Jim McCarthy and is available through Amazon, Audible, and iTunes. Donna also has a caregiver Facebook page: For-Those-Who-Care. Her mission now is to help support other caregivers and their families as close to the point of fresh trauma as possible. In her goal to put her book in the hands of caregivers, Donna is seeking methods of distributing the book, and also funding to supply these books at no cost (she hasn’t won the lottery yet.) She is available as a speaker for clubs, churches, and others. To contact Donna, email [email protected].